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Woman Placed on No Fly List By Her Husband

08/20/2011 by C.

An immigration officer in Britain placed his wife on a “no fly” list after she left the country to go visit her family. He used his security clearance to put her on a list that would not allow her to fly into Britain because her presence in the country is “not conducive to the public good.” For three long years this woman was stuck in Pakistan with her family. Three years! I have heard of people in marriages needing some alone time but this takes the cake.

The discovery was not made until the man was up for a promotion and while doing some background checks they discovered his wife on the no fly list and questioned him about it. He confessed and was fired immediately.

I can only imagine the phone calls for these three years…

“Honey, I tried to fly home AGAIN and they sent me away. Can you please talk to someone at your job and find out what is going on? I just want to come home. Mom is driving me freaking nuts and my sister’s kids are the spawn of Satan!”

“Well love, I spoke to Fred yesterday and he was going to make a few calls but you know how unreliable Fred is…I wouldn’t hold my breath if I were you. Say hello to your mum for me!” Click.

I am sure this woman came home to a house with pizza boxes stacked to the ceiling, an Egyptian pyramid constructed from beer cans and chewing tobacco and a porn collection that would even make David Duchovny jealous. Or even worse…he has started a whole new family. Moved in a trashy woman from the other side of town…and now the whole house is decorated in neon and leather.

My guess is this couple has divorced by now. Maybe that is how he should have handled it from the beginning. I think she might be far less upset about a divorce than she would be finding out he had locked her out of her country for three years. I am no Dr. Phil…but I think I might be right about that.

I did get a great idea from this story. The next time Paris Hilton or the cast from “The Jersey Shore” leave the country, let’s lock them out for three years. I don’t know about you but I am sure there is another country in the world that needs a Snooki.


  1. Grumpy says:

    This is genius, pure genius. This guy is my hero.

  2. C.B. says:

    I had a feeling you would like this one…lol.

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